We've been wanting to move for a long time. We've talked about LA and then Austin and then back to LA. The west coast makes the most sense for JCPE with his job right now and I have always enjoyed it there and have a great network of friends & colleagues to plug into! This is the perfect time for us. JCPE's second feature film, Know How, is almost complete. I'm looking for jobs after recently leaving my Assistant life (hopefully for good). Why not start to look for jobs in LA?!
I don't have many answers, and it's likely that this will take longer than we anticipate but we are really excited about the new chapter in our life!
Here are some FAQs from family and friends:
Why are you moving exactly? (Mama Stirek) - We've been in NYC for almost 13 years which is a really long time! For me personally I have done SO MUCH of what I wanted to do while I was here. Recently my book club read Rules of Civility a novel about women in the 30's in NYC. While reading it I was so moved by all of MY NYC memories. JCPE and I went out for late night Jazz and I started drinking just gin! If I hadn't ever lived in NYC a book like that would have made me SO sad. Instead it made me SO happy and grateful for all of my experiences here. I will treasure them always and never say never we might hate it out there and come back!
What happend to Austin? (Sister Blair) - At behest of my therapist we went to visit the places we were considering living. Austin was really high for a long time, we have great friends and a great sister there! After going to visit it affirmed our love but we wanted to see LA as well. LA just felt right for where we are in our lives right now. We want to take a chance (a serious earthquake might dump us into the ocean chance!) on living the dream there for a while! I anticipate we'll move to Austin or somewhere similar in a few years when we start to have expensive children! It's not out for the count at all.
What about all your non-profit work in NYC? (Everyone we are on boards with) - Right now I'm continuing my work as is, because you never know and the worst thing would be to be here in April with nothing to do! A lot of we both do can be done digitally and over the phone for a while during transitions etc. We never want our passion for our projects to suffer so when we anticipate it being a real issue we will act accordingly!
What do YOU (Tay) want to do in LA? - Right, it makes sense for JCPE to move there obvs. For me, it's not just following him to the west coast it's also been a dream of mine to move somewhere warmer and closer to my family for years now. I'm grateful to have been let go from my former position in such a way that I'm able to job search from home for the next few weeks. I recently went to PA for the Obama campaign for just two weeks but I absolutely loved it. I'd love to do some sort of political organizing in the Los Angeles area. I have a few contacts there that I will be talking to and sharing my resume and applying for jobs that I might love! I'm thinking organizing, social media, progressivism are my key words. California is a fun state politically and I think I can do a lot of good there!
What is the timeline like? - I'm looking for jobs starting now. If I get something I will go and sublet and search for apts while JCPE finishes up work here. We understand that this could take months, but are hoping for Jan/Feb.
How will you get your stuff there? (Dad Stirek) - well! I have no desire to drive a U-Haul across country so Mama Pineiro and JCPE will do a mama/son road trip! It'll be adorable.
What neighborhoods are you looking at? - Silverlake, Los Feliz, and Echo Park probably. We want something walkable for dinner/drinks and we have no concept of where we will be working so these places are the best NYC transplant starter-kit 'hoods.
When can I come visit? (Gugs) - Soon! Let's go to the beach all the time and hide under umbrellas and full body sun proof suits!
Can we go to Spago in LA? (Gugs) - yes! haha let's do everything LA fancy! Including star-maps and possible the TMZ bus tour!
Got more questions? I can try to have answers!!
I've been a bridesmaid four times now and every time is an insanely different experience. At Annie's wedding I was only 19 and even less capable of handling free champagne as I am today! Christiana's was a small affair with a view of the statue of liberty and a few family and friends (the most similar to mine, actually). Loni's was a batshit crazy Jersey fiesta of nutso that ended up being awesome, but involved the most tears. Finally, for Indika's wedding I had the absolute least to do and a dress that I'm going to wear again, so therefore the best time.
I've never been a Maid of Honor but if I were to be I'd want to emulate Crystal and her awesome ability to be on top of everything. My sister and I nabbed a few of Crystal's "Bachelorette Party Recovery Kits" full of advil, mints, lotion, coffee, shower salts (it's a thing) socks, lip gloss and a ton of other fun goodies. I actually had to check my bag on the way home because I didn't want to abandon all the lotion (and spray on hoes) that I got as gifts.
The wedding was beautiful! Indika looked phenomenal, as always. I love how as people we pair ourselves off in such interesting ways. I'm a firm believer that JCPE and I match, we're both little and brown. Indika and John are both ripped and blonde. I get genuine heart flutters when I think of my friends finding the loves of their lives. I also love so much that we have been friends for so long that my family was invited to the wedding. Thank you so much Indika and John for such a great wedding!
Also, I can't wait to see all the pictures! I never want to see the video because I realized I practiced my ONE joke with the videographer while we were taking pictures then used it in my speech! Ugh! So now I'm in the the video twice saying almost the exact same thing! I planned that poorly.
Now that we've been home there are a few ideas floating around for our December reception in Vegas. It's going to probably be a house party, it WILL involve dancing. There will be a speech by my one bridesmaid, Blair. More info and an actual date coming soon!
The big thing is, this time I found myself LOVING Las Vegas. I love that you get to wear heels everywhere because you're not walking a zillion miles. In vegas if you're not wearing heels and earrings you're wearing pajama pants, platforms and huge sunglasses. Basically, everyone looks awesome. I love that you always know what direction you're going in because you can see the mountains so it's impossible to get lost. I love that I went house hunting with my sister to look at houses that were all so far under 80K it made my head spin.
I miss my family. I miss my mom and my dad and all three of my brothers (even you, Decker). I miss Indika and Crystal and Annie and Jasen. I need to learn to drive.
I hear the west coast calling my name.
* IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN BRIDESMAIDS YOU NEED TO GO LIKE, RIGHT NOW. I have never laughed so hard in the theater ever in my life!
I'm talking to you on the phone right now. I love you so much.
I wish we had more time together. I really think that there is a chance we will love close to each other someday. Maybe when JCPE and I have kids we can work something out. I hate being so far from you. I can't wait to work with you to plan our reception in Las Vegas!
I am so lucky to have such a wonderful mother who has always supported me unconditionally in all the crazy things that I do! Thank you for letting us do this additional crazy thing! I know you understand, with all the pressure of getting married we wanted to nip it in the bud and just spend our time with friends and family celebrating as work-free and stress-free as possible!
I feel like out of all my people you are the one who will understand this the most. I think at some point I thought that I wanted a big wedding, did I dress up like a bride? I don't really think so. Eventually those dreams became blurred and I just couldn't see myself in a huge wedding gown. Not this face, not me, it doesn't feel like me. I think you might know that already.
So here I am, doing the most crazy thing that I've ever done, and I'm only able to do it because I have so much love from the most amazing family ever.
Thank you for giving me the courage to be myself. Thank you for loving me so much that you let me go 10 years ago secure in the knowledge that I was never really that far away.
I love you. Be safe & I will too.
So. I know that JCPE is the best, but sometimes, when I think about how amazing his family is I want to hug myself and say CONGRATULATIONS TAYLOR! You not only HAVE a great family but you're getting ANOTHER great family! Like, woah, that's way way more than a girl could ask for.
Lily posted the nicest thing ever on my facebook page today:
To Juan's Fiance,
Hi! It is so fun to say fiance. We are so excited. Congratulation again on your engagement. The picture are so awesome. You guys are the prettiest couple ever. I am so happy that you found each other because you really complement each other beautifully. Welcome a million times to our family Taylorcita we love... all of you. We admire your leadership, talents ,brilliancy and the fun you bring to our family. Know we are complete. We definitely needed you.
HOW EXCITED SHOULD I BE RIGHT NOW??
I can't figure out what's normal and what's suspicious! I'd like to formally apologize to everyone I brushed off in the past few weeks! It's SO HARD not to talk about a wedding! I actually started a registry and started to tell Agnes and she saw the date and was like OMG and I had to make stuff up about just putting any random date in there! Basically, having secrets makes one CRAZY!
I'm like, oh details, ooooh Puerto Rico,,, ooooohnyc!
Party planning WILL happen but not until AFTER the wedding. I want my mom to help me... I need a lot of help actually...
Right now I'm just EXCITED! I signed the contract for the Water Taxi today and really, it sounds out of this world amazing!
If I keep saying OMG it titles nobody is ever going to read them! Is anyone reading this? I assumed that someone will find it eventually!
Getting married is expensive! The wedding part is going pretty smoothly actually! We're going to secure... get this... A WATER TAXI! Just for us! Amazing!
So funny and great way to spend the day on the NY Harbor which we have always loved oh so much! The party part, that's the part that I'm a little overwhelmed about! I need to talk to my mom about it, we keep saying August, but I imagine that it'll get pushed back from that because August is closer than we think! I love September, I love the idea of a Sunday... we'll just have to see! I'm ok.
I keep WANTING to worry about the event itself... but Taylor, one step at a time, that's why we're separating everything like this in the first place! The most important thing is to BE married! Once that is set we'll be golden and we can actually start big picture planning in May!
Every day I feel like I think of a zillion things to blog about. This blog that nobody will ready for 4 months or so... but still.
Yesterday I felt like I did EVERYTHING wrong. It started the day before when JCPE and I were chatting rings and I started to be like "oh, maybe we can do this, or that, or call this guy or do this thing" and finally he was like "omg! stop!" Crapfest he's totally right, I need to stop meddling! I'm crazy! It's like when my parents were deciding to get married and my mom picked out a few rings and my dad bought the cheapest one (or so the story goes). So OF COURSE for me I would try to meddle my way into having a similar story even though I swore my whole life that I wouldn't.
I'm wearing my mom's ring now. It's beautiful. She gave it to me for Christmas last year and I love wearing it. It has actually be a perfect "on the cusp of getting engaged" accessory. It's taught me responsibility (how many times one can lose a diamond ring on the spice rack is actually quite impressive) and my mind always wanders to marriage. How I want my own to be, how my parent's marriage was...
So last night after a massive day of failure (when I literally couldn't make a food decision, did a random number generator, counted down Seamless web for 123 open restaurants and ordered Sushi from the original place I had considered ordering from) I was laying face down on my yoga mat in the living room. In that exact way where you can see all the dust and dirt on the floor. JCPE came home and I said "THE FLOOR IS SOOOOO DIRTY" he said "of course it is, there's a ton of snow and ice and dirt all over outside, it's winter." As in, he doesn't care. I care, but I'm not going to care too much.
So when I think of my mother and my grandmother and their lives and their marriages I think mostly about how my Grandma told my mom that she wished she hadn't spent so much time cleaning right before she died. That was her regret, the house didn't have to be as clean as she made it, she could have spent more time hanging out. My mom has said the same thing, she's said she was sorry for being angry about messes. Not that I'll never be angry about messes, I totally will be. But, for now, I don't mind doing yoga in the middle of a dirty floor if it means that afterwards instead of swiffering and vacuuming and dusting... I can sit next to JCPE on the couch and cuddle instead, because that's infinitely more important. Thank you Mom and Grandma for teaching me that.